Panalo Tayo Pinoy

Tayong mga Pinoy ay dapat matuwa sa nangyari sa ating bansa dahil dito natalo na natin ang kasikatan ng isa sa mga cartoon characters ng Japan. Ang Hello Kitty nila ay laos na………. Hello Kitty lang? Wala yan sa HELLO GARCI natin!!! diba? Yan ang Pinoy!!!…..


Question: Why do the Generals in charge of the pathetic Abu Sayyaf search carry flashlights and hand mirrors?Answer: Because they are using them to try to find their own assholes. So far, no luck.

If I Died..

~~~The wife of Erap asks, “Honey, if I died, would you remarry?””After a considerable period of grieving, I guess I would.. We all need companionship.””If I died and you remarried,” the wife asks, “would she live in this house?””We’ve spent a lot of money getting this house just the way we want it. I’m not going to get rid of my house. I guess she would.””If I died and you remarried, and she lived in this house,” the wife asks, “would she sleep in our bed?””Well, the bed is brand new, and it cost us $2,000. It’s going to last a long time, so I guess she would.””If I died and you remarried, and she lived in this house and slept in our bed, would she use my golf clubs?””Oh, no,” Erap replies. “She’s left-handed.”~~~~


~~~The teacher asks someone to use the word “facinate” in a sentence……So little Gloria Macapagal Arroyo raises her hand and the teacher picks her. Gloria says, “My family and I went to my uncles ranch and saw all his animals, it was fascinating!”…The teacher says “That was a good sentence but I want to hear facinate in a sentence.”……Then, Little Cory Aquino raises her hand and says “I went on vacation to my province and saw nice sites, it was so fascinating!”……The teacher says “That was also a great sentence but I want to hear fascinate in a sentence.”……Finally little ERAP raises his hand and the teacher picks him. So, little ERAP takes a deep breath and says, ” My aunt’s favorite sweater has 10 buttons, but she has really big B-O-O-B-S, so she can only fasten eight!!!” ~~~

Imelda goes to heaven

“Imelda dies and goes to heaven. The heavenly court is gathered to welcome all the newcomers to heaven. God the Father is there seated on his throne in all his splendor. The Second Person of the Trinity is there also, and the Holy Spirit, the Virgin Mary, and all the saints. As Imelda enters, everyone stands up ­ except God the Father, who does not get up from his throne. Jesus, the second Person of the Trinity turns to him, and says, “Heavenly Father, what’s the matter? Why don’t you stand up to welcome Imelda Marcos? God the Father replies: “I am afraid to lose my seat. If I stand up she will take my throne.”