You have Mail! December 7, 2006
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his neighbor, a Singh, came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. He opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into his house.
A little later he came out of his house again, looking nervous, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house he went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here our Singh came again,looking very heated up. He marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it shut harder …
Russian Checkpoint
An American journalist was stopped at a Russian Checkpoint in the bullet-pocked suburb of Chechnya.
The Russian soldier said, “Get out of the car and open the trunk!”
The American replied, “I’m sorry, but the handbrake on the car is broken. I can’t take my foot off the brake or it’ll roll back down the hill.”
So the Russian says, “Do you take me for a FOOL?!” as he slides into the passenger seat, and stamps his big boot onto the brake pedal.
“Now, go and open the trunk!”
So the journalist reluctantly complies with the soldiers request and goes and opens the trunk of the car.
“Now”, …
student
Q: What do you call two Filipinos flying an airplane?A: A pair of pliers.
Wrist Band
Bakit may wristband si Erap? Sagot: Para malaman at maalala nya kung nasaan ang right at left hand nya!
Erap at a Bar
pumasok si erap sa isang kilalang bar. pag-upo niya, umorder ang kanyang katabi. sabi ng lalaki sa waiter, “Jack Daniels, single…” nung tinanong naman ng waiter si erap, sabi niya, “Joseph Estrada, married…”d;-P
horse
Teacher: Erap, spell HORSEErap: H…O..Teacher: Bilisan mo!Erap: H…O..R..STeacher: Bilisan mo sabi eh!Erap: Ya!..tigidig..tigidig..tigidig..
COLLEGE
tumatawag si erap sa mga college na eskuwelahan…tumawag siya sa u.p., sa u.s.t…tapos..tumawag ulit sya…sabi ng kausap nya sa telepono…OPERATOR(MAN VOICE): PADRE FAURA..THANK YOU FOR CALLING…ERAP: AY…SORRY PO FATHER…WRONG NUMBER!…
Si Bishop Bacani
Cynics are saddened that Bishop Bacani is involved in a sexual harrassment scandal. BACANIyari niya? Hindi siguro. BACANIyakap lang niya, o BACANIyapos lang — wala pang sure, BACANI lang.
Guess
Nang pumunta si Erap para bisitahin si Clinton sa america. Niyaya siya ni clinton na mangabayo, of course pareho silang naka-maong jeans. habang nag lalakad sila papunta sa kani-kanilang kabayo, napansin ni bill clinton na maganda ang jeans ni erap. Clinton: that’s a nice pair of jeans. what brand is it? Erap: Rili? its libays (levi’s) meyd in da pilipins. To return the compliment medyo binola din ni erap si clinton….Erap: yu gat a nays jeans tu wat brand is it?Clinton: GuessErap: Okey …(medyo nag-isip)… is it Wrangler?Clinton: Guess… (medyo inis na)Erap: (pagod na sa kaiiisip) I gib up, naw …
matematiks
Noong grade 2 si Erap, tinananong siya sa recitation ng kanyang math teacher….erap! stand up!….what is 1+1? Erap: (medyo nagyabang pa at pasigaw na sinagot ang teacher) Ma’am, 2!… pabilis nag pabilis ang tanong ng teacher… 2+2? erap: 4!…. 4+4?…erap: 8!….8+8?….erap: 16!!…16+3?.. erap: sabay sigaw….32!! ….Teacher: Ngeek!! minemorya pala!!!
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